This is me...

These are my footprints; I took them last week while I was in San Diego. No, they are not as magnificent or perfect as the footprints in the famous poem, but they are mine and they are beautiful.

I was “tagged” today by a very special friend, Sharon from Mana Moon. I spent 15 minutes crying after reading her “blob” (inside joke that I just KNOW will make Sharon smile) and not because I feel sorry for her but because I didn’t think it was possible to love her more. She is a courageous and strong woman who inspires me every day!! Though we have never met in person, I feel as if we live right down the road from one another and I appreciate the bond we have hat makes me feel this way.

The “tag” I must accomplish today is to tell you six secrets about myself and then pass it on to 5 other people. My friends and family are my world, everything else is the fillers, so for those who know me, I do not hold things back (Debi’s nodding her head right about now). So, without further ado, here they are:

1. When I was 9 years old, myself and two friends were collecting empty cans for a school project; we hit all of our neighbors and even our local grocery store (I was always a determined child). On the way home we passed my brother’s friends house and decided I would ask them if they had any empty cans. It was a condo so I had to enter a courtyard to knock on the door. My two friends did not know these people so they stayed outside the fence...I should have never knocked on that door. Harold Fligg (yes, I am using his real name), the boys father, opened the door and listened to my request for empty cans. “Of course I have empty cans. Why don’t you come inside.” My instinct told me not to go in so I didn’t. He asked me again and when I said no that is when he grabbed me pulling me inside him home. To this day, I still do not know how I did it but I escaped the son-of-a-bitch but we left me scars on my right arm and left wrist from his fingernails. It seems that Mr. Fligg had just been released from prison for child molestation and the courts felt mercy on him since it was close to the holidays and gave him one year additional probation.

2. I have incredible patience but I find that once my patience has been worn I do not hold back what I am thinking. That’s not always a bad thing buuuut I struggle with cushioning the blow. I have always been a matter-of-fact person and stupid people, yes STUPID people, drive me crazy…to the point that I honest to God think I should get help! I know this doesn’t sound like a big deal but it bothers the hell out of me. Here’s a good example: my ex-fill in-boss was an absolute dumb@ss that literally sat at his desk and would fall asleep while I ran an entire department along with several installation crews. We constantly bickered with one another, then one day he asked me, “Why don’t you like me…” (I can hear Debi snickering already)…I tried to soften the damn blow but couldn’t so I told him what I was thinking (and please pardon the language you are about to read)…I told him, “Because you are a f’ing idiot and a lazy piece of sh!t. You are absolutely worthless yet I am impressed everyday that you find your way to work…I guess you need to sleep sometime…” Yep. I said that. Honestly, I do not mean to offend anyone but isn’t the point of this tag to be honest?? No, I was not fired from my job :-)

3. I am the one that found my mother dead in her bed. It is not a secret to the family and only a couple of my friends know. I don’t talk much about finding her because I am afraid that my dad will blame himself because he called me that day and asked if I had heard from her and if I would go check on her. Well, in reality, Paul and I have always blamed ourselves. We were at the house earlier that morning doing some light cleaning (Mom had not been feeling well so we would go over once a week and help out). I left to do some errands while Paul finished the house. When I came back to pick him up, she was still in bed so I thought it would be best to not disturb her. Later that day, Paul stopped by again on his way to work to check on her. He heard some noise in the bedroom so he left thinking she was up and getting dressed. It was shortly after that my dad called. To this day we believe that if….IF we would have just gone into the bedroom she would be alive today.

4. I am 37 years old…well, October 25th I will be ;-), and to this day I literally am afraid to let my feet or legs hang over the bed in fear that someone is under their and will grab them!! Really!!!

5. I am afraid to take new medicine in fear it will kill me…yet I am trying to get into nursing school. I don’t know what else to say about that.

6. I say bad words…a lot. I say “sh!t” every single day. I will even drop the f’ bomb when pushed. A-hole is another common word I use. I do my best to not say it around the kids but I admit I have slipped a time or two, or three. But, just because I say a bad word does not change who I am!

So there you have it- six secrets about me. Take it and run with it…if you come back then I know you are my friend.

Now I have to tag 5 people but I do not have five people to tag…three of them have already been tagged!! So, here are the lucky two:

Rosebud Collection- The Mum and The Rose
Harriet- Hey Harriet

I hope you take this to heart, ladies, and know that regardless the secrets, I love you dearly!
Hugs,
Laura