Courage Of a Young Man

Last month I shared with you a fabulous story about my oldest son and now I would like to share with you a challenging story about my youngest son, Cody. Much like his older brother, Cody is willing to drop what he is doing to help someone in need. Uh, as long as the need is not his chores. LOL! But seriously, Cody has been known to help the elderly at the grocery store by taking their items out of the electric carts and putting them onto the belt, or holding doors for people that are behind him. He will even help his fellow classmate with sticky problems on class work. Simple, gentle help that a lot of people just turn their nose up to. Oh, but not Cody.

Cody has always been extremely intelligent, always soaring beyond his class mates. But there was always something a little different with him...he would do his homework but not turn it in until the teacher would contact us...it was the same thing year after year. He would play with one or two kids at school but very rarely play with them after school. He tended to play more with CJ and HIS friends. We often suggested he go play with his friends but he would rather stay in the house.

Last year his attitude began to change abruptly. He became verbally abusive and began to get physically destructive. Paul and I were at a loss. Here was our son who had always been laid back and easy going was losing control right before our eyes; he was a ticking time bomb. We took him to a doctor who suggested he has ADD. After having an evaluation done by a child psychiatrist, it was confirmed...Cody has ADD and ODD (oppositional defiant disorder). The reason for the outrage was due to his age and not being diagnosed sooner. I did not believe he had ADD because he did so well in school...so he would complete his work but not turn it in or we would tell him do something and an hour later it still was not done. We thought it was just Cody being Cody. The doctor explained that kids with ADD either soar above the other kids or they fall far behind. Also, the later in life it is diagnosed, the more complications the child occurs such and major mood swings and destruction of property. Cody was prescribed a medication that, if he indeed has ADD, we would see a difference....we did. We still struggle a little with the ODD but the medication does help.

Just when we finally got him comfortable with the thought of having ADD/ODD and needing to take medication for a while, the doctor pulled Paul and I aside last week to tell us he suspects Cody has Asperger's disorder- a mild form of autism. I didn't believe him. How, after a year, do you tell me this NOW?? First we are told Cody is ADD/ODD now he has autism? The doctor told us that he has been noticing a behavior and pattern with each visit and he didn't want to just make a quick diagnosis. He gave us some reading material and some names of centers here in AZ so we can take him to be tested. I want a second opinion and I do appreciate the fact that the doctor supports me.

After reading about Asperger's and comparing them to Cody, the doctor may be correct. But I can't help but be selfish and ask WHY? Why Cody? Hasn't he been dealt enough in his young life??? We are going to have him tested at the Melmed center in Scottsdale. We don't care about the cost, we just want a correct diagnosis so our son can get on with his life. If he as Asperger's, so be it...we will continue to support him in his plans of being a Quantum Physicist and he will succeed in life.

I didn't share this with you today to feel bad or sorry for Cody. I wrote it so you can see what a strong young man he is and how successful he has been and will be. We are so very proud of him.